The Strength of Love
Chapter 17 - Decisions
Rin heard the baby crying and her father getting up to get her. She smiled and snuggled back into her blankets, content not to get up just yet. She listened to the loving sounds her parents made to her new baby sister as they fed her and got her ready to go back to sleep. Life was perfect! It had not always been so, however. She lie in bed, thinking about the past… When Princess Aara first approached Rin and told her she wanted to speak to her, the little girl was terrified! The woman had never sought her out on purpose before! The only thing she could think was that she had done something wrong and was about to be punished for it. As she followed the Princess into the gardens, trailing slowly behind the regal figure, her mind began to race as to what she could have possibly done. She kept mainly to Yukina’s wing and Kaiba’s tower now that she had made these two friends. On occasion she visited InuYasha in his room, and she did spend a small amount of time with some of the other males and castle residents, but those visits were not often and kept short. She wracked her brain trying to remember if she had done or said something that may have offended someone. She could think of nothing. As she followed the stern-looking back of the Princess, however, her trepidation grew.
Princess Aara stopped her trek under the cherry tree she dearly loved. When she sat on the bench and turned to Rin she was a bit taken aback by the look of fright on the girl’s face. She did not let it sway her, however. She felt the child’s confusion and ignored it. This needed to be done. Since she had been the one to make the final decision, it was up to her to break the news.
“Rin, my males and I, including Sesshomaru, have been discussing your plight recently. I have sent word to Hiten to search in Kaede’s Village to find you a suitable home. He will be back soon with word. I trust someone there will want to add you to their family.” When the girl said nothing, but stared at her instead with her mouth partially open in shock, she continued. “It is time you found a new home. The castle is just not suited for a single child alone. You have done nothing wrong, but you wander about as if you were lost. I know you and Yukina have bonded, so I trust you will come to the castle now and then to visit with her, but her section is just too cold for her to be a mother to you. So, as I said, it has been decided that you will leave as soon as suitable parents can be located.” With this, Princess Aara stood up and placed a hand on the child’s slim shoulder. “I hope you will find some happiness and forgive all of us for making this decision without consulting you.”
The Princess turned and began walking away. Rin could only stare after her in stunned silence. She was being sent away! It took her several heartbeats for all of the Princess’ words to sink in. She had said Sesshomaru was in agreement with this. Her beloved Lord Sesshomaru! He did not want her there anymore! With tears welling in her eyes she turned and fled the beautiful gardens. When she got to her room she flung herself on her bed, no, their bed, she thought in disdain. It was no longer hers. She could no longer keep the tears from falling, and indeed, she did not even try to. She lie prone on the bed for most of the afternoon, sobbing her heart out. She did not hear when the soft knock came on her door.
Sesshomaru knocked softly. When he got no reply he pressed his ear to the door and heard her sobbing. He turned the handle and entered her room as quietly as possible. He knew this had been hard news for her to take. She had already been made to leave one home. Now she was having to leave a second. None of this had been her choice. He knew she would have been happy to walk his lands with him for as long as he allowed it. The dangers she sometimes had faced while in his company had been few. He had always been there to protect her. She had trusted him, loved him. Now he had abandoned her, and in her mind, he was sending her away, like the villagers had less than a year ago.
When Rin felt a gentle touch on her back she gasped and turned over quickly. When she saw it was none other than the one she had been crying after, the tears started afresh. “How could you? You said I would always have a home here! You told me you wouldn’t leave me! Now you are sending me away? What have I done? Have I displeased you? Lord Sesshomaru, I don’t want to leave!” Her words were almost distorted from the high-pitched wail of anguish that accompanied them.
Sesshomaru said nothing, simply gathered her in his arms, and cradled her as if she were an infant. As he placed his cheek against her hair he couldn’t help but remember the day he had brought her back to life. He had held her in much the same posture then. He had never regretted saving a human. She had taught him much in their brief time together. He had thought love was something only others could ever feel. He had loved his mother and father, true enough, but that was the love of a child for a parent. True love he had never thought existed for him. Now he knew he had been wrong. It was because this small child had opened his heart that he had been bound to Princess Aara, whom he loved with his whole being. If not for Rin that never would have happened. He held her, rocking her slowly now and again, until the sun had set. When her wails had subsided into small sniffles, he finally spoke. “Rin, it is not that I do not want you. I have always been fond of you, and I always will be. I simply think it best for you if you go to a home with proper parents. I cannot be your father. Nobody here at the castle wishes for you to be sad. Indeed, that is why we all decided to find you a real home. We all wish only for your happiness. You do not seem happy here
Rin heard him as if from a distance. She wanted to sit like this for always, never letting him go. “Lord Sesshomaru, I am content here. I have Yukina and Kaiba. I can see you whenever you have time. I am not unhappy! I am not!” Her words were punctuated with a tiny fist pounding his thigh. When he said nothing she finally sat up and turned to face him, still sitting on his legs. His look was sad. “Perhaps a little lonely now and then. You are gone so often. But I have lessons with Kaiba. I am learning new things almost every day. Yukina keeps me busy as well. She and I have great fun together. Please, Lord Sesshomaru, if you speak with the Princess, I am sure she will let me stay!” As her excitement grew her words came faster. “I promise not to wander about any more. I will keep to my room, Kaiba’s tower, and Yukina’s wing if that is what I need to do! I will be so quiet not even the Princess will remember that I am here! Please, Lord Sesshomaru, please don’t make me go!” With those words, carried in a shrill little-girl voice, she once again let the tears begin falling
Sesshomaru gently wiped her tears with his sleeve. “Little Rin, can you honestly say you would be happy cooped up in your room, day after day, avoiding the castle residents? I know Kaiba and Yukina are your friends, but they are both healers. They could be called away at any time and be gone for days or even weeks at a time. Plus Kaiba has Suzuki as an apprentice. As much time as he takes to give you your lessons, it detracts from Suzuki’s learning.” When he said that her look turned to one of astonishment. She had never considered that she was taking away from Suzuki. She had met him only once, in Kaiba’s tower, but she had liked him. The thought that she had taken something away from him made her sad. Seeing her look, Sesshomaru continued. “I have heard wonderful things about the people in Kaede’s Village. There is a large group of Protector Wolves living in the forest just on the outskirts of town. There is actually a Wolf Demon living in the town itself. He is mated to a human named Kagome.” He began telling her what he had learned about the residents of the Village. He did not know if there were children in the town yet, but he did know that several of the couples were expecting. He explained about Miroku and Sango, the brave monk and his demon-slaying mate. Rin knew of them, as Yukina had told her all about the battle with the monk’s air void, which had almost cost Kaiba, Bakura, InuYasha, and the monk all their lives. That was how Yukina had come to be a permanent resident of the castle
After listening to her white demon tell all he knew about the town’s residents, she felt only a little bit better. He explained to her that he was not abandoning her. When he told her that he honestly thought it the best thing for her, the tears that had been falling dried. “Lord Sesshomaru, if you feel this is for the best then I will go without further complaint. I know you want what is best for me.” She said these words while staring at her hands, clasped together tightly in her lap. “Will I ever get to see you again
“I will try to stop in now and then to check on you. Besides, I will see you when you come to visit Yukina. She has taken quite a liking to you. She asked for you, you know, when she heard you would be leaving. After talking it over with everyone, however, it was decided that her wing is just too cold. You would fall ill in no time, being in her wing for a long time. I know she will miss you terribly."
When he said that she gasped in horror. She had not seen Yukina today! Her time here was short, and she had neglected her friend! “I must go see her now! I don’t know how much longer I will be here, and I simply must talk to her!” She jumped off his lap, headed towards her door in a rush, not even thinking to tell Lord Sesshomaru goodbye. His chuckle made her stop in surprise and turn back to face him
“Rin, it is the middle of the night. I would think she is asleep.” His words were accompanied by a grin
“Oh. Well… Oh.” Rin had not thought about the time. She trailed slowly back to the bed, her feet dragging. It was as if all her energy had used itself up. She sat down on the bed next to her white demon once more. She leaned her head against his furs and placed her small hand on his strong thigh. When he placed his arm around her shoulder she snuggled closer to him. They sat that way far into the night
When Rin’s gentle snoring indicated she had fallen asleep, Sesshomaru gently picked her up and placed her in the center of her bed, pulling the covers over her. “Sleep well, Rin. I am sorry this has to be goodbye, but I wish you peace and happiness.” He placed a kiss on her forehead, tucked the covers around her one last time, and exited the room, closing the door as he went.